274: Can therapy trigger a victim mentality? Impulsive shopping, Lesbian dating

In today's show, Dr. Howk discusses:  I grew up facing a lot of turmoil; I had a physically and sexually abusive father, I left home and was homeless from 16 to 18, and dealt with a lot of tumultuous grooming situations at a young age, and so forth. However, I was dealing with it really well up until 20 when I started to take therapy; while simultaneously moving to a tiny city that was very into “woke” culture. I feel as though it may have exasperated my victim mentality, but I am unsure. I want to know, was the victim mentality trait already integrated within my genetics or does woke culture and modern therapy have enough influence to exasperate that mentality?  Does it matter the severity or weight of what you went through when it comes to coaching yourself to leave the victim mentality? How do I cope nondestructively with stress?  As a quite emotionally unstable yet conscientious person, I find myself stressed a lot of the time. In the past, my way of reacting to stress has been reaching for food. I learned that I stress ate because my body was seeking something to increase my chances of survival and reproduction during an uncertain time. More recently, after successfully stopping myself from using food to alleviate stress, I have turned to impulse shopping. This also makes sense from an evolutionary perspective, since the things I buy include jewlery, hair and nail appointments, and clothes, which all enhance my physical appearance and also increase reproductive success.  I was wondering if there is something I could effectively do to soothe stress in the moment that won’t make me gain weight or break my bank account. If I had to put a label on it, I identify as a bisexual female. I’m overthinking applying the EP concepts that I understand so well when it comes to dating women. For instance, do the 10 paid dates still apply with two women? Copyright Beat Your Genes Podcast Host: Nathan Gershfeld                               Interviewee: Jen Howk, Ph.D. Podcast website:  www.BeatYourGenes.org True to Life seminars with Dr. Lisle and Dr. Howk : www.TrueToLife.us   Intro & outro song: City of Happy Ones · Ferenc Hegedus