Improve Your Nonverbal Communication Skills

“A “majority” of the meaning we attribute to words comes not from the words themselves, but from nonverbal factors such as gestures, facial expressions, tone, body language, etc.” ~ Edward G. Wertheim We use non-verbal cues to reinforce our communications. They can help us show our emotional state, level of interest in a topic, and regulate the flow of conversations. This episode will focus heavily on understanding the different types of non-verbal communication and what they can mean, discuss some of the patterns that can be seen, and end explaining how non-verbal cues can miscommunicate intentions or how to avoid sending the wrong message. Disclaimer: Nonverbal communication and cues differ vastly between cultures. This variance can be as subtle as the amount of space between people when communicating or so vast that hand gestures used by children in one culture would be very offensive in another. That said while we do have international listeners our knowledge is based on American culture so unless otherwise specified the nonverbal meanings we discuss will be for communication in America. Episode Breakdown * 07:21 What is non-verbal communication? “When we interact with others, we continuously give and receive wordless signals.” ~ HelpGuide.org Non-verbal communication or bodylanguage helps to reinforce or modify the messagee (what is said in words). It can show the emotional state of the speaker or listener and regulate the flow of communication. Bodylanguage contains messages to the other person such as if you care about what they are saying or if you are being truthful. It is also used in defining relationsips and providing feedback for the person speaking. * 11:22 The 5 Roles of non-verbal communication Edward G. Wertheim, Ph.D. listed in his chapter on “The Importance of Effective Communication” five roles that non-verbal communications play in our interactions with each other. Repetition shows the ability to understand and repeat the message. Contradiction show a difference in view to the message or speaker. Substitution is the use of non-verbal communications in place of verbal messages such as a head nod, eye roll, etc. Complementing adds to the verbal message. Finally accenting adds emphasis to a message such as pounding on a table to make a point. * 15:45 Types of non-verbal communication There are several types of non-verbal communication including we can exert some control over in conversations facial expressions, body posture, gestures, eye contact, touch, and personal space. Others such as paralanguage and physiological changes are less controllable. * Facial Expressions These include smiling, frowning, or even blinking. Facial expressions are mostly universal across culture but the intensities may vary. Children learn to read facial expressions at very early in development. * Body movements and posture These can include hand gestures, nodding, or shaking of the head. How you sit or stand shows your receptiveness to the message. An open posture is one of facing the person with hands apart and legs uncrossed. It communicates interest, openness, or readiness to listen. A closed posture with arms folded and legs crossed communicates boredom, disagreement, or discomfort * Gestures Specific movements to exchange information between people. They can be divided into four categories: emblems, illustrators, regulators, and adapters. Emblems are gestures that serve as words such as OK, come here, or stay. The hitchiking thumb is an emblem gesture.