57. Rhythm, Routine, Rituals, and Anxiety

With all the talk these days of reopening society, I want to take this opportunity to speak with you about not only the anxiety which our children are experiencing during the ‘lockdown’ – and, believe me, they are feeling anxious – but also the anxiety that will be generated through the reopening process itself. Rhythm, routines, and rituals all have a part to play in this process, and I’m here to help support you and your children through it all. In today’s episode we look at exactly what we mean by rhythm, routine, and rituals, and acknowledge that both during the pandemic and after, rhythms are going to change. We look at behaviors and how to evaluate and work with them, determine when anxiety becomes ‘not normal’, and face up to the reality of the generational trauma our children are experiencing these days. I will also offer you some suggestions for finding your new rhythms and helping ease your children through the transition of ‘reopening society’. While there is undoubtedly going to be a lot of ‘mental health cleanup’ in the wake of our current circumstances, today’s episode is all about what can be done now to help ensure our children know that they are safe and they are loved and that we are here to provide all the emotional and physical swaddling they need.   The Finer Details of This Episode: We are all finding a new rhythm during this pandemic The change in rhythm is generating anxiety in our children You need to determine if a behavior is new or if it’s an ‘amped up’ version of an existing behavior Don’t be crushed by demonstrations of kids clinging to one parent and rejecting the other and don’t give in to it What’s good for our children is a firm, strong voice and actions that say, ‘You don’t have to worry about this’ Everything you choose now is going to be a habit When anxiety interrupts or affects your quality of life, it has slipped into ‘not normal’ and you should seek out help This pandemic is creating ‘generational trauma’ The first few outings during the ‘reopening of society’ transition is where you will want to note anxiety in your child, lean in, and help ease them through it The biggest thing will be finding a new rhythm once again Creating an emotional tether with your child will help during transitions   Quotes: “Our little ones thrive on non-verbal communication…they 100% know that something’s going on…and so there’s anxiety.” “Any shitty behavior your kid had is going to be amped up.” “Huge right now is a ‘mommy clinginess’.” “If they’re given control, they’re going to run with it in the wrong direction.” “Your average 3-year-old is on par with your average dog brain-wise.” “Hey, do you need some love right now? Because it’s looking like you need some love.” “When anxiety hits, every kid just needs physical contact to know they are loved and safe. They need emotional swaddling, but they need physical swaddling too.”   Links: Jamie’s homepage - http://www.jamieglowacki.com/  Oh Crap! Potty Training - https://www.amazon.com/Crap-Potty-Training-Everything-Parenting-ebook/dp/B00V3L8YSU Oh Crap! I Have A Toddler -  https://www.simonandschuster.com/books/Oh-Crap!-I-Have-a-Toddler/Jamie-Glowacki/Oh-Crap-Parenting/9781982109738 Jamie’s Patreon Page:   https://www.patreon.com/join/jamieglowacki? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices