You Don’t See It Until You See It

You don’t see it until you see it. You can’t unsee once you see it. One day, all of a sudden, I just saw it. My thoughts were, "hey this is a problem." "Something just isn’t right here."   Before this, I made excuses. I justified everything. He’s not feeling well today. He had a rough childhood. He is stressed at work. He didn’t have siblings. The kids were being loud and frustrating. Our son could have been more obedient. I could have been more understanding. I could have said that better. I should have known that would upset him. Anything and everything except for - he should not talk to us this way. His words are mean and hurtful. His tone is not okay as my partner for life. He is NOT a loving and compassionate person. Why were those not the things I was thinking and saying? I misdirected the fault for what was going on for years, many years. Laying the blame everywhere except where it truly belonged. Until one day….